{"id":21,"date":"2002-07-23T21:54:00","date_gmt":"2002-07-24T03:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.laughingmonkey.org\/?p=21"},"modified":"2002-07-23T21:54:00","modified_gmt":"2002-07-24T03:54:00","slug":"by-the-short-hairs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/?p=21","title":{"rendered":"By the short hairs\u2026"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Allow me to wax rhapsodic about having short hair. Really short hair. 1\/8&#8243; long kinda short hair. Bzzzzz&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>I first &#8220;took it all off&#8221; about three years ago. I came home late from a hard day at work only to remember I had plans out with friends that evening. And my hair looked like crap, and I had just zero energy to deal with it. So, I mulled this over while I had a drink. Hmm, I had thought about buzzing my hair before. I have a beard, so I already had the necessary trimmer, and I could even see this strategy where I would start with the longest trimming guide (like 1.5&#8243;) and see what that looked like, and then the next shortest, and then the next, until I could find something I kind of liked. Another drink, and I had swallowed all the courage I needed.<\/p>\n<p>So, as per plan, I started with the longest trimming guide and buzzed my hair to 1.5&#8243; all over. Well shoot, that wasn&#8217;t so dramatic. My hair was reasonably short already, so in some places 1.5&#8243; didn&#8217;t take anything off at all. Did I have another drink at this point? I&#8217;m not sure. But, for some reason it seemed to be a good idea to jump immediately to the shortest trimmer guide next. *grin*<\/p>\n<p>Now <b>that<\/b> is short! For the first ten minutes I don&#8217;t think I could stop running my hand over my scalp. It&#8217;s like when you lose a tooth and your tongue unconsciously pokes at the empty socket. I was amazed by the short fuzzy nap, and I could feel every little tickle of air blowing over my scalp.<\/p>\n<p>So, late for dinner, shy over my baby-white scalp, curious about the reactions I&#8217;d get, I rushed out the door. I was the last person to arrive at the restaurant, and as I sat down at the table, conversation stopped as people turned to look. The girl directly across the table from me, the wife of a co-worker, exclaims, &#8220;Wow, I dig your scar!&#8221; Now, I&#8217;ve had this inch-long scar over my right (starboard) eyebrow since I was about 5 years old (car accident when I was a pup), and no one has ever said a single word to me about it until that night. Apparently scars go with shaved heads. All I needed was a big hoop earring to complete the pirate look, I guess.<\/p>\n<p>So, it&#8217;s been three years now, and I&#8217;ve cheerfully kept my hair short since that time. You can&#8217;t beat it for low-maintenance, out-of-the-shower-and-run, no muss, no fuss. I like that it makes me look more butch; with my sunglasses and knit skullcap I can pull off a Jean Reno look a la <a HREF=\"http:\/\/us.imdb.com\/Title?0110413\">The Professional<\/a>. And I love that girls seem eager to run their hands across my scalp to see how it feels. &#8220;Oh well, if you must, go ahead.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Allow me to wax rhapsodic about having short hair. Really short hair. 1\/8&#8243; long kinda short hair. Bzzzzz&#8230; I first &#8220;took it all off&#8221; about three years ago. I came&#8230; <a href=\"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/?p=21\">Read more &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=21"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=21"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=21"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/laughingmonkey.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=21"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}